The Buffalo Bills played extraordinarily well in two out of the four phases of the game in their 9 - 3 loss to the Carolina Panthers while doing alright on special teams and terrible on offense. The two phases they did well in were defense and amount of clapping by the head coach.
Every time they panned the camera to the sideline during the game, there was Sean McDermott clapping and giving brief pep talks to his players. No matter how ugly the game was, McDermott did not stop clapping. His hands must have been bright red after the game. There is no way he will be able to keep up this amount of clapping when the weather gets frigid in December.
I bet he's not a one dimensional clapper either. He is probably equally good with the other moves in his arsenal including the golf clap, double clap, slow clap, clap back, and of course, I bet he gives one hell of a standing ovation.
McDermott was clapping so furiously on Sunday that shortly after the game, he got a phone call from company that makes The Clapper offering him an endorsement deal. If you are not familiar, check out the below commercial that started in the mid-eighties to the tune of -- Clap on, clap off, The Clapper! [clap][clap].
The company installed the products all over his household that night, while Sean stayed in his office studying tape and wondering what went wrong with the offense. He spoke with his wife the following afternoon and he asked how she liked the product. "I love it," she gushed, "It's so easy and I don't even have to get out of bed to shut off the lights." Sean was ecstatic to hear this. He grew proud knowing that his years of furious clapping finally were starting to pay off.
Sean came home later that night and his wife and kids were so happy to see him. They sat down at the table and said grace before consuming their meal. Sean's two kids ate everything on their plates including the vegetables and were on their best behavior. He exclaimed "I have the best family in the world. I'm so proud of you kids!" and that's when it happened ...
McDermott started clapping rapidly sending the lights flickering on and off in the room due to the newly installed Clapper. One of the kids starting crying hysterically and the other was on the border of having an epileptic seizure if the flickering continued for much longer. Sean immediately realized his folly and stopped clapping.
He felt a tingling sensation up and down his body and his adrenaline was pumping. He had finally experienced the meaning of true power. He knew clapping was a powerful thing, but being able to control your lights and television with a good double clap was just too much of a burden for him to bear. He knew he wouldn't be able to control himself and so he decided he must back out of his deal with The Clapper and return the products they installed so that his house could return back to normalcy.